Kan jeg få en rewind?

Jeg vil ha det samme som James Caan

2005-12-13T12:35:00.000+01:00

Som artistkoordinator møter jeg på en del sprø folk, for å si det mildt. Denne karen tar allikevel kaka. Han går under navnet DJ Crazy Man og er visstnok jæli heit i statene. Han er litt av en diva og snurrer faktisk ikke skivene sine selv. Det har en kar som gjør FOR ham (!) ...her har vi ham backstage på Quarten i fjor.
På tirsdag skulle Kristin og jeg rigge opp scenen på Macondo før settet til Crazy Man og plutselig hører jeg en brysk stemme som ber om mat. Når jeg snur meg stirrer DJ Crazy Man meg midt opp i trynet og sier at han skal ha mat nå med én gang - hvis ikke blir det ikke noe show. Jeg måtte ta en taxi til Valkyrien Take-away. Den gamle filmlegenden James Caan hadde en gang rost stedet for de beste burgerne i byen, noe Crazy Man hadde fått med seg. Vel, jeg fikset biffen og konserten ble en suksess. Happy ending, dere! Happy føkkings ending. Puh.

The Toaster Incident

2005-12-13T12:23:00.000+01:00

dear diary
today i almost flipped. only two days had passed since i got my brand new hello kitty toaster off the net, and apparantly the piece of shit is already gone... gone! gone like the happy "tenderloin days" of joey fatone! fuck!!! why does this always happen to me? SIGH... at least ive got that aspen thingy to look forward to. ps judy if ur reading this i serously want back the dvd of my big fat greek wedding you borrowed. i told you to put it in my locker after you watched it, and thats like, what, a month ago now? youre such a bitch when it comes to stuff like that and i seriously know im not the only one to say that!! sorry guys, i know im a bit whiny today. i promise to post some new photos tomorrow.

Nordraak Kilimanjaro

2005-11-20T17:06:00.000+01:00

So I was walking down the street in my Tribeca neighborhood, minding my own businees, listening to my ipod, pondering the beauty of this wonderful life and stuck in bewilderment as to why it was so hot in in November when I hear a faint "Hey." I look around to see where the noise was coming from and find the voice echoing from a car stuck at a light. I take out one of my headphones to hear this man say again, "hey" and wave. I think, maybe I know this person so I wave back. At second glance, I realize the man is a total stranger so I put my headphone back in my ear and walk on... He drives up next to me and starts to shout again and I think "who is this guy?" He motions, "Come here." So being the curious, yearning for as many experiences as possible person that I am, I walk up to his car. He opens the door and says, "get in." I say, "No, you're a stranger...that's weird." He says, "Come on, what's the big deal." I say, " I don't know you, I'm not going to get in your car...besides I have a girlfriend." He says, "That doesn't matter. I just want to talk to you." I laugh and say, "Sorry, I have to go." I walk off. He pulls his car over and parks and walks on after me. "Do you have something to do?" he says. "Yes, I have lots I have to do." Meanwhile, I think showtime, finally I get to holla back. So I grab my phone and slyly try to take his picture. "Why are you trying to take my picture?" Busted. "I'm not trying to take your picture. Do you want me to take your picture?" "Do you want to take my picture?" he asks. "Sure," I say. ...Anyway, he ended up walking me almost to my apartment and kept asking me for my number. I kept saying, "It's nothing personal, but there is no point. If you call, I'm just going to either avoid your call or tell you that I don't have time to hang out so I might as well save you the trouble now and tell you that I'm not interested." Still, when i said goodbye, he asked, "When I'm going to see you again?" I said, "Maybe on the silver screen..." Then he gave me an uncomfortably long hug goodbye and said, "But I find you so attractive" to which I replied, "Well take one long last look" and walked away.
I really don't know what happened to that picture, because I can't seem to find it on my phone... but today I did this woodcut, so you'll get some kind of image of what he looked like, I guess.

Just like old Saxophone Joe

2005-11-20T10:31:00.000+01:00

I dag ringte moren min for å minne meg på å skrive en tale til bryllupet til Steven, noe jeg selvfølgelig dævver helt av. Steven er en cocksucker og beklageligvis en gammel venn av familien. Da jeg kom ut av iskremsjappa på hjørnet av 43rd street sto det en sunnmøring foran meg som tydeligvis ikke var helt vel bevart. Han bar på en sevjefløyte, men han spilte ikke på den, derimot ropte han "sitte fast på Notodden med Briskeby Blues" igjen og igjen som om det var et mantra. Jeg ristet på hodet og la et par mynter i koppen hans.
For en weirdo... Vel, det var bare veksel jeg helst ville kvitte meg med allikevel.

Kwesi confidental

2005-11-16T14:24:00.000+01:00

jeg så opp fra pulten min og plutselig var jeg hooked, hogtied and collared. var dette charlie rishaug, nok en gang? jeg sukket og åt min bran flakes. hvor er du, charlie?